So it’s been a year…. One year since I was kicked to the curb. One year and it still hurts, we have gotten by and moved on. It still hurts….. Knowing that people had so little care for me and my family that we were just tossed out and before Christmas no less…so yes I may still have some issues but in review some great things have happened in the last year. So here are some highlights from 2010.
The greatest thing about this last year has been my family. If I didn't already know my wife is amazing, she has been supportive thru five different jobs and our moving to a new state. My daughters are also amazing and very flexible in all the different traveling and moving and new schools. I'm am blessed to have such an amazing family. My parents have also been great in helping us settle and move.
For sure a great event was for sure my trip to Mexico with my Brother and Father, being able to serve others in such a huge way was an amazing turning point with me and a turning point on my road to recovery. After that trip I felt a strong call not to give up on ministry. Shanna and I had decided to move back to our home city to be close to family and have some support. After the Mexico trip I sent out thirty different letters to Churches in the area we would be moving back home to not asking for a job just putting myself out there saying what I had done and I who I was. Only God could bring an opportunity together that came our way, someone I had sent the letter to knew of a Church that was looking for a youth pastor. So I ended up getting a part time job as a youth pastor in the same area we were moving to. This is a great job for me right now; it’s a small church so I get to be very involved in the church in other areas not just youth ministry.
Church
Another great thing was moving back home close to my parents and Brother. I have had more time to have lunch with my brother and my Dad. I have also been blessed to help out my Brother in his new venture. His starting a non-profit in the community was a big undertaking for him and I am glad I can help out in any way I can.
The last positive event that came this year is myself and Shanna being in college with a good path to graduation.
So over the last year we moved to a new state from little apartment to a nice house with a garage. I've had five different jobs and many different crazy ideas. We went to Disneyland with our whole family we supported each other thru two grandma's deaths and gotten a cute little puppy. I don’t know what the future holds and I don’t know what the next year holds but I continue to strive to be a good father and good husband, as far as my issue with being tossed out…well I don’t know how to overcome that…….
2 comments:
Unfortunately I know that feeling all too well - of losing a job that I liked very much and was really good at, of feeling like I was kicked to the curb by my boss while everyone around me is in shock because they thought I was a great asset. It happened nearly two years ago for me but it still haunts me even though I don't want it to.
I know you have a lot of support and love and faith in your life, so there isn't anything I can say that you don't already know.
But I will say, the one thing I learned through that experience is that life is truly not fair sometimes. It's just not fair. Sometimes it doesn't matter how hard you work, how talented you are, how much passion you have, how good of a person you are.
All we can do is work toward accepting the things we cannot change - much easier said than done, of course. I remember my mentor telling me that I could make a choice to let this situation take me down an angry, hateful path, or I could choose to learn what I could and move forward, and not let one person make me doubt my talent as a teacher.
I know you've moved forward and I know that anger is still there. I think it really just takes time for that to dissipate. I try to remind myself whenever the memories come back...those ones where I am having conversations with my boss and I say the things I wish I had said then - that's when I bring my awareness to the bitter, angry feelings and I consciously practice letting them go. Sometimes I imagine them floating away like a cloud and that helps. Other times, it's too difficult.
You have such a big heart, I know you feel really deeply. I am the same way. That's why it hurts so much. As you said in your post, life goes on, good things continue to happen. Eventually, that job and the pain of losing it will be a distant memory because you will be where you belong.
Hang in there!
Hey - you DO still have friends that were "left behind"! Even though the situation sucked, we're still here for you!!!
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